Warped Guitar Neck
Cue the dramatic music.
DUN-DUN-DUUUUUUUUUUUN…
We’re going to talk about a warped neck.
I’m gonna bet you’ve heard the expression before. Probably more than once. Warped necks are the terror of guitarists and bassists everywhere. But what exactly does it mean? What’s a warp, anyway?
Well, I’ll get to that but first I want to talk about what it is NOT.
A warped neck is not an end to a conversation.
What do I mean? I mean that so many people throw the ‘warped neck’ phrase into a discussion as a coded way to say one of the following things.
- From players you’ve asked for advice:
“I have no real idea the cause of the problem you’re describing so I’ll claim your neck is probably warped so I can get out of this discussion while still seeming knowledgable.” - From a repairperson you’ve asked for advice:
“I have no real idea how to fix your problem — or I can’t be bothered to fix your problem — so I’ll claim your neck is warped, and your guitar a write-off, to get you out of my workshop.”
Regarding #1 above, I don’t mean it to sound harsh as it’s usually well meaning. The warped neck is one of those things that’s thrown about so much that it’s entered the popular guitar consciousness. Now, even perfectly reasonable and rational players are primed to think that their guitar neck is horribly mangled as soon as they discern anything out of the ordinary.
I don’t blame players for jumping to the warp conclusion or even for telling others their neck may be warped. It’s natural to go there after we’ve heard, for so long, that this was the cause of pretty much all neck problems.
Moving on to #2, I definitely DO mean to sound harsh. There is no excuse for a repairperson end a conversation with ‘your neck’s warped’. I've heard this more than I should have from customers asking for a second opinion — variations on “The other guy said the neck was warped, threw his hands up and shrugged.”
OK… If the neck really is ‘warped’, give some options for dealing with it. Don’t just throw the warped card on the counter and walk away. That’s either lazy, lazy-minded, or both. Even if the guitar’s worth less than the gig bag it’s in, a customer deserves to understand the problem and the potential route towards a fix. Don’t dismiss a guitar as warped and hint it’s beyond saving just to avoid trying.
As a customer, if this ever happens to you, I’d advise you not bother with another visit to that repairer.
All right… Calm down, Gerry. Rage subsiding… Control returning… Anger fading.
So, summing up here, a claim of a warped neck should be the opener of a conversation about what’s actually wrong with the guitar and what can be done to rectify it.
And I think it’s important that conversation needs to expand and define what warped means in this particular case. Warped is no use as a catch-all description. We need a definite diagnosis of an observable issue. That done, we can move on to discuss the path towards fixing it.
Next time, we’ll look more at what a warped neck might actually mean. In the meantime, beware of the blanket ‘warped neck’ claims. Seek more detail. Dig deeper.
P.S. given we've talked about how people quickly jump to warped conclusions, I think I deserve huge credit for not making a ‘warp speed’ joke. I'm glad I'm above that sort of childishness.
This article written by Gerry Hayes and first published at hazeguitars.com
